“God is our refuge and strength a ever-present help in trouble.” Psalm 46:1
It has been one crazy week. I come on here this morning trying to find the space to write this. Not on the page, but in my heart. This week I went through some hard things. Some rough spots in the road, and it hurt. It was like a punch in the arm. (Ok, face is too violent for me) And it just leaves me here wishing that God would give me a little heads up like my weather app does and tell me that the brief shower, maybe even a thunder-storm, will begin at 3:23 P.M. That is not how it works, though.
No. Not at all.
I have not been sleeping well for a couple of months now, and honestly I am so tired. Can I say that one more time? I am tired. Not just physically but emotionally and sometimes when I say that word I wish someone would look at me and say, “Tired of what?”. If we were face to face right now possibly drinking coffee or reading the newspaper, (people do that) you would see the tears forming as I would try to answer that question. Since we are here instead, you will not see those tears and we will not read the newspaper, but will you hold my coffee while I list these for you? I am tired of fighting a battle inside of my head every single day. I am tired of watching people I love make mistakes that alter their road. I am tired of the enemy, and I am tired of hurting. I am tired of worrying about things that I have no control over. I am tired of looking at a plate of food and fighting to eat it. I am tired of believing the lies. I am just plain tired, worn out, exhausted from the load that I take on by myself. Ok, I will take my coffee back now. I am not complaining of the tiredness (is that even a word?) in my life. I am just saying that it can be hard, and that is a choice that I make. I know, I am very stubborn at times. Yes, I do happen to get that from my Grammaw.
Wait. Time out again.
Ok, sure I will tell you about her. People tell me I am like her, and that is a high compliment to me. She is hilarious for one and she just has no idea!! She is my favorite person, and her smile lights up my heart. She loves to tell story after story and my favorite one happens to be when her and her sister ate a whole pound of bacon. Well you kind of have to be there for that one to hit home, but when you are man does she make you feel like you are there with her. She also loves the Gaithers. She really does, and I bet if there is a program on tv going on right now she is watching it as I write this. She is proud of her children, her grandchildren, and her great-grandchildren. I taught her every thing she knows when it comes to her iPhone. Now, that is very entertaining. Her favorite place to eat is Cracker Barrel where she will probably order okra, pronouned oak-ree, as a side, and then ask you if you want it. Do not bother saying no. Just take the okra, ok? Take one for the team! Basically, she is just as stubborn as me, and I happen to love her very much.
“The LORD gave them rest on every side, just as he had sworn to their ancestors. Not one of their enemies withstood them; the LORD gave all their enemies into their hands. Not one of all the LORD’s good promises to Israel failed; every one was fulfilled.” Joshua 21:44-45
God does not tell me when bad things are going to happen or when the rain is coming. He says something better than that. In Matthew 11:28 it says, “Come to me all who are weary and heaven laden and I will give you rest.” Rest. There is that word again. I was reading this morning and I decided to look it up to see what I could find. Here is what I got. After the battles that Israel faced, God gave them rest. You see that? After the battle. After they fought. After God delivered them from their enemy. Then He gave them rest on every side it says. No, I do not fight physically a battle outside with a sword, shield, and armor on. But spiritually, I am fighting it every day. We all are, but the cool thing is we never fight alone. It is time to get ready for church now. My weather app tells me the rain will be around 6:27 A.M. and it will be a light one continuing over the next hour or so. I think I will change my answer when someone asks me how I am today. I will just simply say I am waiting on the rest. On the rest I know is coming. So, my tired friends, ( I know I am not the only one) go drink you some coffee, open the word, and let God hang out today. Because in the chaos of the battle you are facing He is the calm and the peace. Besides, in the end we win. Remember that!
But now the LORD my God has given me rest on every side, and there is no adversary or disaster. 1 Kings 5:4